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“Counting’ the Days till Halloween”

Judy Lockhart DiGregorio

From the “Twilight Saga” movies to television’s “True Blood,” the topic of vampires continues to seduce audiences. My favorite vampire has always been the lovable Count von Count on Sesame Street. Known simply as The Count, he is modeled after Bela Lugosi’s Count Dracula. This Count, however, is obsessed with numbers, not blood. He loves to count!

A funny and appealing character with lavender skin, bat-shaped ears, and a tongue that looks like a red spade, The Count sports a flat black hairdo and caped tuxedo. He is passionate about counting anything and everything and does not like to be interrupted when he is counting. I used to enjoy watching The Count as much as my children and grandchildren did.

When I found a life-sized replica of The Count at an after Halloween sale, I bought it. It only cost five dollars, and I could already imagine the fun we would have scaring people with it. I wrapped the Count up in a sheet and stuck him in the hall closet until the following year.

On October 1st I retrieved The Count and placed him on a green chair in the living room facing the front door. Every time anyone visited our house and saw him, they screamed. It was wonderful. Then Dan decided to make things more interesting. Just before I took my shower one night, he hung the Count on the nozzle in the shower stall. As I opened the shower door, I jumped and gave a bloodcurdling shriek at the apparition in front of me. I did not think that was funny!

For revenge I hung the Count inside Dan’s closet, but it didn’t scare him in the least. Next I stuck the Count in the driver’s seat of his red truck. That didn’t frighten him either. Dan remains much calmer than I do when confronted with intimidating objects.

Thus far we have also hidden the Count behind doors, under bedspreads and couches, etc., but sometimes placing him in plain sight works far better. Occasionally, we prop him up on one of our commodes. This usually gets some attention from visitors or us if we’ve forgotten he’s there.

So far the most successful fright has been when Dan hung The Count outside the bathroom door while our grandson Tailen took a steamy shower. When Tailen opened the door, he was face to face with The Count. He jumped almost as high as I do when surprised! He only yelled a little, however.

Each Halloween night, I place The Count on the wooden swing sitting on our front porch. He never fails to surprise people. He looks quite lifelike in the dark as he reclines with his head back and his legs crossed. He appears to be watching those brave enough to step onto the porch. We’ve heard many a screech or squeal when someone spots him.

The Count is very busy these days counting the days until Halloween. No telling where he will show up next in the meantime. Some things go bump in the night. Some things go bump in the day. If you’re brave enough to drop by, you’re welcome to meet The Count in person. We will be glad to ‘count’ you as one of his latest victims.

Copyright © October 2017, Judy L. DiGregorio

Judy Lockhart DiGregorio is a humorist, speaker, and the author of three humor books and a CD from Celtic Cat Publishing, Knoxville, TN -- Books: Life Among the Lilliputians, Memories of a Loose Woman, Tidbits, and CD: Jest Judy.

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